CVP 1

Introduction to the Humanitites
Ashleigh Govea
MW Online

    As a little girl, I remember going to my grandmothers house every summer. I remember chasing my older brother Stephen around her small house listening to the hardwood floors creek and thump as I ran up and down. I can still smell her perfume and hear the television blaring in the living room. These memories are simple memories, perhaps unimportant to some, but these little memories mean the world to me. My grandmother was without a doubt the most amazing person I will ever meet. I say that, because I know there will never met another person as caring and giving as she was. Devoted to Christ. Devoted to her family. She was the biggest role model in my life. When I was 11, my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer. Even as young as I was, I saw my Super Woman deteriorate before my eyes. Her skin turned a dark yellow, her bones were frail and weak, and her strength was almost non existent. My family gathered at her house daily to make her feel happy. The adults cooked and cleaned and tried to make her feel comfortable but in all of our hearts, it was difficult to see her in such horrible condition. As time passed, my heart continued to ache. Each and every one of us felt helpless and hopeless. We kept prayer in our lives but couldn't help but wonder "why?". We begged God for answers, for an explanation or a sign letting us know of all people, why her? The most devoted Christian who not only believed in God but practiced her faith. When she passed I looked to God for help and I began to read the bible just like my Grandmother wanted me to all of these years. Although I couldn't help my Grandmother I knew I wanted to help others some way, somehow.

    As I got older and time passed, the pain of losing my grandmother never healed. Since then, I have lost many more loved ones to Cancer including my godmother this past year. Around the time of losing my godmother I was working Full-time and not attending school. I had fallen into a routine of going to work and putting school on the back burner sometimes not even sure if I would ever go back. Watching another loved one grow weaker by the day before my own eyes I was determined to become like my godmother and become a Nurse. All these years she had made a difference in all of her patients lives even making many friends along the way. These heartbreaking events have led me to determine my future career as a Nurse specializing in Pediatric Oncology. Working at a hospital I see so many different cases. Many elderly just like my grandmother and godmother who are helpless and sick. As I approach these patients, I try to be as warm and caring as possible. I go above and beyond my job duties as an ER Admissions Specialist to make each and every patient comfortable. I treat every patient as if they were my family or my loved one laying in that hospital bed sometimes unable to care for themselves. As hard as it was to see my grandmother in such pain, I want to help these people feel comfortable and cared for. I might not be able to cure these children from cancer, but I can definitely make a difference to each and every one of them.

    These unfortunate events helped me turn my life around. I began to live every day with gratitude and a sense of hopefulness of the future. Seeing my loved ones in such pain urged me to make a difference in others lives. I learned that although it may take great strength you must always try to find a positive in a negative situation. It was a struggle for me to let go of my anger and confusion and begin to see that me being angry wasn't going to bring my loved ones back. It wasn't going to change the future or the present and all I could do was move forward with new knowledge. Most people have been through something tragic or heartbreaking, and perhaps they are still carrying around that heartache, I urge you to find what God's purpose was for these tragic events and see a brighter picture as difficult as it may be. I am most proud that I too could find this strength and that I got back into school. As I look at how far I've come, If these events would have never occurred, I don't think I would have come back to school. I had been out for three years and I had become accustomed to not making it apart of my weekly schedule. My priorities have changed and I am grateful I have the ability to help others who too have become sick. The pain of losing them will never fully heal, but I can share my story with others in hopes that they too will find the light in every darkness.


Part II
1. I would rate the difficulty of this assignment a level 3. It was not easy nor hard. I enjoyed sharing my experience with others however it was somewhat difficult for me to choose an event that I would feel comfortable sharing with the entire class.
2. I learned that I have become stronger in mind, body, and soul. Reliving these two tragic events broke my heart once again, but I am glad that one day, I will be able to help people just like them.
3. If I knew then, what I know now, I don't think it would have made the process of losing a loved one any easier. Although I may see the light at the end of a very dark tunnel, to get there is a healing process. I know that everything happens for a reason and as I was going through this it was difficult to understand what that reason was. As we grow older, we become more mature and more knowledgeable.
4. Three universal societal issues my turning point addressed were the coping with death, depression, and the sense of hope in finding a brighter ending.